Three short weeks ago I started a new job as an administrative assistant at a non-profit for disabilities. It was a lot better than my previous job as cashier at a grocery store but for some reason, I still wasn’t happy with it. I felt overwhelmed, under-qualified, out-of-place. It didn’t feel like home. It didn’t feel like I was meant to be there. Everyday I was fearful of doing something wrong and getting fired. I felt like I was walking on a floor that would give way at any moment. I couldn’t get comfortable there. Today, my boss took me into her office and told me that she was going to let me go. She said I was very intelligent, but it simply wasn’t working out. She believed I wasn’t happy at the job and she needed someone who would be, plus the executive director stated that the job would be changing and they needed someone more qualified than me. I had no chance. So here I am, a woman with autism, no job, no idea what to do next. It hasn’t really hit me how far down shit creek I am because I haven’t even gotten my first paycheck. I have already applied for unemployment. I think because of my recent diagnosis with autism, I will qualify for disability, so I’m going to apply for that too. I am at a loss at what to do next. I have been applying for jobs everywhere today because I NEED SOMETHING. Unemployment is only going to get me $175 a week and that is not enough to pay rent and cable and car insurance. I’d sell some of my stuff, but I don’t have anything of value to sell (except my computer, but I need that for school, and my car but I need that too).
Anyway, that is where I am at now. I believe things will work out for the best. They have to. I also believe this happened for a reason, but I don’t know what the reason is quite yet.
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