There are certain aspects of my life that I do not reveal and that is rare, for me. I am very open about my life and that is probably dangerous because I will likely be taken advantage of, no doubt. There are certain things though that I do not tell a lot of people, one happens to be my dating situation. I have never dated, ever. I am 27 and have never dated. I’ve reached a point in my life that I just don’t care about dating anymore. I don’t care about making sure I date by a certain age to be normal, because I passed that age a long time ago. I just don’t care anymore. I don’t really have an interest in dating anymore. I desperately want to fall in love and be loved by someone, but I don’t want to date.
One thing everyone knows about me because they can physically see it, is that I am obese. I use my weight as a way to keep people at a distance. I continue to gain weight because of my fears of intimacy and getting to know someone on such a deep level. I want someone to see past my weight and get to know me, but I also am desperately afraid of that kind of connection with someone. It’s really hard to attempt to get on a healthier regimen when I am self-sabotaging myself because I want to keep people away from me. I am at a loss about how to fix this. Before I was fired, I emailed The Emily Program, which is a program for people with eating disorders. I had hoped to start going there once my insurance kicked in, but that never happened. I hope soon to get insurance again and hopefully I can actively work on myself so I can get healthy and love myself.
Quiet Mary on Life is weird monalyssa33 on Life is weird Quiet Mary on Life is weird Quiet Mary on Life is weird Quiet Mary on It’s me again….